My darling Sam. She is so lovely and funny and energetic. So many good things in one tiny little package. And yet... When she was good, she was very good.
And when she was bad.... YOWZA!
First I must say thank you to all for your kind emails and comments on my post from last Friday. R and I had a very good weekend. He took the children Saturday all morning so I could get a pedicure and take a long run. Then he took the children most of yesterday so I could work and gym it. So, problem (mostly) solved. Now we are onto a new one.
My sweet little girl, so much like her mother. Sigh. I adore her. But I do not adore the eight gashes my newborn (does he still qualify as a newborn if he is 12 whopping pounds of flesh?) is currently sporting.
In her former life my daughter was apparently a cat and she swipes at her brother every time we take our eyes off for a second. Why are her nails not shorter? This is a good question. Short of ripping them off, I am not sure I could get them any shorter. There is no white tip to speak of, I cut them everyday and still she manages to draw blood. It may have to come to nail removal in the end.
No book has advice for us, no parents can tell us what to do. It seems we have a one-of-a-kind winning combination of an 18-month age difference and an incredibly feisty, jealous toddler. Most people only get one or the other. If she were older, we could punish her more effectively. If she were less feisty, she would not care. Sadly, neither are true. She does not understand and we cannot get anything across to our little cave creature.
Harvey Karp suggested growling, which I did when she hit him on his soft spot Sat. night. All that achieved was much laughter from the peanut gallery (my hubby). How do we solve this? We are discussing cages here, people. It is that dire.
I want my children to love eachother, but right now, I just want to keep them apart. R says he is sad--"one child is clearly jealous and miserable while the other is bleeding." How I wish I, too, was this kind of parent. But I am not. All it makes me is angry. Sam's behavior is bringing out the cavemama. I need to protect my helpless baby. I need to protect him from my slightly more capable baby. How did we get here? And how do we escape?
If you have any ideas, please, please, please share them. We are desperate and slightly miserable.
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3 comments:
My friend with kiddos 51 weeks apart got a big plastic play enclosure deal and put her youngest in there, usually in the gymini or something similar and that kept her eldest away. It wasn't this exact one, but something similar: http://www.amazon.com/North-States-Superyard-Gate-Play/dp/B00020L78M.
I have no solutions, but I'm certainly interested in what others have to say, given that this situation is likely going to happen in my house too.
Is she scratching him on purpose with the intent to harm him? Or is it more of an accidental thing from being too rough?
Maybe try doing 30 second time outs with her when it happens?
I randomnly came across your blog while searching something on google and started reading, loved it and have made it all the way to this post. I think one reason I love it is because your little girl sounds EXACTLY like my 21 month old son. I may have a suggestion ... my son used to, and sometimes still, would hit and scratch as he finds it funny. Everytime he would hit/scratch we would take his hand firmly and rub his hand in a petting motion as if petting an animal say on our arm or wherever he hit. We would say pet us nicely and then give him hugs and kisses for petting nicely. We did it everytime and now whenever he gets rough with us or the animal we will say ah ah pet nicely and he knows to be gentle. I am not sure if it will work for the siblings, but I know our son can at times be crazy!!! And it has seemed to calm him down in that area. Good Luck!
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